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Rebuilding: When Your Relationship Ends, by Bruce, Dr. Fisher

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This revised, updated third edition of the international bestseller is built on more than two decades of research and practice, incorporating feedback and life experiences of hundreds of thousands of divorced men and women who have read and used REBUILDING. This book has spawned thousands of divorce recovery groups in the U.S.A., Canada, Australia, New Zealand, Mexico, Finland and elsewhere. Fisher's thorough understanding and presentation of the nineteen-stage divorce recovery process is remarkable. Clearly the most widely used approach to divorce recovery, Fisher's rebuilding model has made the divorce process less traumatic, even healthier, for his readers. They often comment, "He seems to know exactly what I'm feeling!" This new edition, revised and updated with the assistance of psychologist and marriage and family therapist Dr. Robert Alberti, continues Bruce's tradition of straight-to-the-heart response to the needs of those who are divorcing or divorced.
- Sales Rank: #1505512 in Books
- Brand: Brand: Impact Pub
- Published on: 1992-09
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.00" h x 5.50" w x .75" l,
- Binding: Paperback
- 288 pages
- Used Book in Good Condition
Most helpful customer reviews
19 of 20 people found the following review helpful.
finally a serious book about the end of a relationship
By A Customer
This is by far the best book I've found about dealing with the pain and trauma of a relationship that has ended. It lays out nineteen stages that you're likely to go through, from denial and fear, through loneliness and rejection/guilt (including a discussion of the differences between being dumped and dumping), grief, anger, and then to the more positive stages of letting go, refinding one's self-worth, becoming more open, loving, trusting and finally finding purpose freedom.
The book is based on years of experience in seminars for divorcees, and there are lots of examples that are well explained and discussed. There are also specific "assignments" for each stage. For instance, there are specific strategies for dealing with fear and anger, and these are very concrete and helpful.
The book also suggests that "growing relationships" can be helpful while working through the aftermath of a serious relationship. Growing relationships can be friendships or sexual relationships, but the point is that they are open, honest, and that a main goal in the relationship is that the partners learn about themselves and each other here and now rather than building a long-term committed and stable relationship. I found it interesting to read about the differences between such a relationship and a conventional, committed, long-term stable relationship. It also freed me from thinking that I should immediately see any new relationship as a committed long-term relationship. There are other kinds too, and many of the authors' insights about growing relationships would also be useful in a long-term, committed relationship.
Each chapter has a section about children's responses to their parents breaking up, in the stage the parents are in, and finally there's an appendix about how to have a healing separation, which is like a trial separation except both parties commit to working constructively towards their personal growth and their coming together again as a couple.
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful.
The hurt CAN heal. You CAN stop hurting NOW.
By A Customer
FIVE STARS +++ - Reading this book will help you more fully understand your feelings following the loss of someone you love. This is absolutely the most helpful book to read if you have ever lost someone by divorce or death. While reading it, I felt that Dr. Fisher had been hiding in my house and taking notes. I experienced every emotion possible for someone who has experienced the loss of someone they love. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
A great book for personal growth
By A Customer
As someone trying to get over a seven-year relationship back in 1994, this book was my savior. I needed to understand why I felt what I felt. This book allowed me to understand the mix of emotions and turmoil I was going through. And contrary to other books offering more creative approaches, Bruce Fisher's actually explains the complex psychological process of grief, loss and recovery. I still read it today to understand other's feelings and reactions and to better manage my current relationships. A must.
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